Pineapple Express

As I watched the nightly news, I saw a story about a weather event that brought heavy rain to parts of California which, in turn, caused destructive mudslides. The reporter said this kind of weather event, which comes off the Pacific Ocean, is called a Pineapple Express. I had never heard of a weather event called a Pineapple Express, so I looked it up on Wikipedia. Here’s what Wikipedia says:

Pineapple Express is a non-technical term for a meteorological phenomenon characterized by a strong and persistent flow of atmospheric moisture and associated with heavy precipitation from the waters adjacent to the Hawaiian Islands and extending to any location along the Pacific coast of North America.

That was quite a mouthful of words. I think the writer could easily have broken that into 2 or 3 sentences. But I’m picky about those things because I’m a writer and always have been (though never as a profession). If I had possessed a piece of chalk when I was in my mother’s womb, I would have written “VW was here” on the inside of it.

On the other hand, the term made me recall the 2008 stoner action-comedy film titled Pineapple Express. Most people think it’s hilarious. IMDb rates it 7 out of 10. I tried to watch it but got bored after five minutes. Maybe you have to be stoned to enjoy it. Don’t let that discourage you from watching it. As the saying goes, your mileage may vary. You can watch the movie on Amazon. I may even take another whack at watching it.

Pineapple Express is also a popular strain of marijuana. It’s a hybrid of Trainwreck and Hawaiian. Leafly says,

“The smell is likened to fresh apple and mango, with a taste of pineapple, pine, and cedar.”

Allbud says,

“Pineapple Express is chosen to treat a lot of medical problems including anxiety and stress. However, it is even more effective at curing the symptoms of chronic depression at the same time. If you are suffering from mild pains and aches, you should look no further.”

Sounds great to me. Where can I legally buy some? Not in Virginia.

Then there’s a company named Pineapple Express. Their website, which at this time has only one page, says, “We deliver” (but you have to be 21+). What they deliver is not made clear but it likely has something to do with weed. There’s another company named Pineapple Express Delivery, but that company is in Canada and appears to deliver only within Canada. Of course, cannabis is legal everywhere in Canada. That’s why the Canadian flag has an image of a marijuana leaf on it. I’m kidding—it’s actually a maple leaf.

I’ve given you, my reader, more than enough to ponder, so I’m wrapping this up. I’ll be back when I have another hour to kill.