I went to bed at 9pm.
I couldn't sleep.
I got up at 12am and looked for my bottle of Xanax. I take only about one pill per year and the bottle is 5 years old. Even expired, the pills probably still work. But I couldn't find it. I went back to bed at 2:22am.
I couldn't sleep. I tried not to toss and turn because I know it bothers Nuria.
I heard the boiler start up at 3:57am.
I heard a train come through the city at 4:10am. It blew its air horn. Then there was only the sound of the boiler. Then the locomotive blew its air horn again. The second time was louder than the first, and instantly I knew what track it was traveling on.
I heard the boiler cut off at 4:32am. The boiler had run for 35 minutes. It used to run for 20 minutes. Is the problem with the boiler or with the thermostat?
I got up again at 4:45am. It's still dark. I sat down at my pc and I read a lot of news on YouTube. A small electric heater is running at my feet. I'm not even close to sleepy. The radiator just banged loudly—it's cooling down. I'd go for a walk if it wasn't 46°F outside with light rain. Sunrise is an hour away.
I hate nights like this.
2 comments:
Wow-- what a night -- I had two nights like that recently and couldn't figure what it was.
I did everything to my bedroom--change the sheets--and finally the insomnia faded in a few days. I know it was something I had on my mind but I couldn't identify it -- then I thought something I ate but it wouldn't be more than one night.
Holidays are really difficult -- I thought of the homeless people sleeping in the cold and many by choice -- I thought of taking them blankets but realize the best idea would be to take them to a program service church who helps the homeless.
I thought of all my friends and family long gone -- I think this hurts the most --the lack of control I have to reach and bring them back in my life -- I miss my long gone brothers -- we had such laughs when they were alilve -
Age I think causes us to feel more deeply, more passionately and hurt more painfully.
Enjoy the days with whom is in your life -- others can't be brought back. Make good with what you have today -- and appreciate it --don't wallow in what can never be again !!
And I recommend writing at your computer during those nights of insomnia --see what's on your mind -- get it off there and put it in some prose or a story.
Good luck my Friend -- you'll conquer this as you've conquered other issues.
Best. LL
Good morning!
Sorry for you because I know what it means. As LL said, I think about my family, the absence of my parents, relatives, problems that others have, etc.
I learned that it is a strong weapon that always help me, "prayer". It calms me down and feel sleepy.
Insomnia is a disease that many people are getting these days, because of stress, worries, financial problems, family problems and more.
I try to eat better, stay calm, not to think about problems that I can not fix, exercise, too.
I hope you will be able to get some sleep today.
Be happy, we don't have too many days left.
TA
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