Antidote

My blog is relatively little known, which is okay with me. I write for fun and because I’m partly a writer, partly a poet, partly an engineer, partly a … okay, you get my point.

But if I wanted to have a massive readership, I could. All I need do is write a blog post that contains the most outrageous claims that I can imagine, that makes promises and guarantees that no one could ever deliver, and in general is so unbelievable as to be laughable. Then I would sit back and watch twenty percent of Americans swallow it whole, believing every word. But ethics prevents me from doing that. Just from grazing many articles on the Web, it appears having ethics puts me into a minority of bloggers.

Oh, by the way, I had Covid-19 this week. I managed to get over it in three days by using a special formula I concocted from my years of studying chemistry and microbiology. It may sound odd that someone who is a writer, a poet, and an electrical engineer would also have studied chemistry and microbiology, but my interests are very wide-ranging. I’m like a modern-day Michelangelo except without the fame.

Anyway, my anti-Covid formula worked like a charm. Tuesday was the first and roughest day. I couldn’t eat; I was weak. I couldn’t get out of bed. My stomach was queasy, my sense of taste was shot. Late that night, I started my formula and each succeeding day I was better. By late Friday I felt so good I ate a BK Whopper with fries. That’s when I knew I had taken too much of the formula and I had to cut back.

To tell the truth, I did have some help concocting the anti-Covid formula. Tuesday night an angel appeared at the foot of my bed. He looked around my room and then looked straight at me and said, “Your bedroom is a mess. But that’s not why I’m here.” Then he told me how to complete the formula. I asked him why he was helping me and the angel said simply, “It is not your time.” And then he vanished.

I remember thinking, “If I write about what just happened, no one will believe it.” Then my next thought was, “Of course people will believe it. Twenty percent of Americans will believe anything. I bet twenty percent of Americans would believe the Washington Redskins could win the next Super Bowl.”

No, I’m wrong. There are some things that no one would believe.