Late Night Meanderings

I popped an over-the-counter sleep aid pill at 8:30 PM, watched some tube while I waited for it to kick in, and went to bed around, oh, 10:30 PM. I read a Discover magazine for about 15 minutes then dropped the Discover to the floor beside the bed and turned off the light. (Strangely, my first impulse was to write “turned out” the light. Turned out. Where did that “out” come from? Perhaps it originated in an archaic phrase, “put out the lamp”, which referred to a kerosene lamp that had an actual flame that had to be extinguished – put out.)

My antihistamine-drugged brain fell asleep and I dreamed a long dream. (In my dream I was held prisoner by Homeland Security, who seemed intent on pissing me off every way they could, and which they did, and of which I made sure to let them know by pissing them off every way I could. But that’s another story.) Then I awakened in darkness. I lay in bed for a long time, a half hour or more, before I rolled over and looked at the clock. It’s glowing digits proclaimed 1:44 AM. I had slept for three hours, almost. Thank God for over-the-counter sleep aids. Where would I be without them? Probably right here, typing a blog post.

I ate way too much yesterday. I don’t know why. Wait, I remember why: I was hungry. But why was I so hungry? Don’t know. Yes, I do know. I ate a lot of carbs yesterday. Carbs always make me hungry. I ate a hamburger (hamburger bun carbs); I ate a “bacon & tomato on whole wheat” sandwich (bread carbs); I ate a couple of baked “chicken cutlets” (breading carbs) and three egg rolls (wrapper and cabbage carbs). I ate a bowl of “high fiber” cereal that was much sweeter than I would have preferred (all kinds of carbs, from the high-fructose corn syrup coating the carbohydrate flakes of cereal to the lactose in the milk). I wonder, if I ate some more carbs right now, would it help me to go to sleep?

In fact, I was reading a web page about how complex carbs eaten along with tryptophan-containing protein can calm the brain and let you sleep, and at the end of the article a reader had posted this comment:

I've been sticking to mostly vegetables lately to lose a couple pounds, but find that I don't sleep well. Last night I had a big ole honkin' bowl of spaghetti and a slice of garlic bread, and slept straight through the night. Do I have to choose between a good night's sleep and better fitting clothes? Anyone?

And another reader posted this most helpful comment in reply:

No, you don't. Sooner or later you're gonna die. Enjoy your food and drink now, 'cause you ain't eatin' or drinkin' when you're dead. "better fitting clothes"? Who gives a rat's a$$ about that? Who's lookin' at ya? Would you rather look good or feel good? I say, EAT! DRINK! BE MERRY!
P.S. That spaghetti and garlic bread sounds fantastic!

Mmmm. Spaghetti with garlic bread. Damn. Now I’m hungry again.