Phones

I have two phones, which I refer to as "old phone" and "new phone." My lady friend Nuria has two phones, which she (and I) refer to as "old phone" and "new phone." I use my new phone for calls and for WhatsApp. Nuria can use either of her phones, but her old phone has a Costa Rican phone number and her new phone has a U.S. phone number. She has WhatsApp on both phones. WhatsApp apparently doesn't care about country codes. It works regardless of where the phone it's calling is located. So if I'm on WhatsApp I can call either of her phones.

But when she goes out, she takes her old phone. When I go out, I take my new phone. If I want to call Nuria and she has driven somewhere, which phone do I call? Without thinking much about it, most people would assume "call the new phone." Whenever someone buys a new cell phone, that's the phone you call to reach them? Right? But not with Nuria. I have to call her old phone. Of course, I can't make a phone call to her old phone, I have to use WhatsApp because her old phone has a Costa Rican country code which I can't make a phone call to, but I can make a WhatsApp call to it.

Now, both of her WhatsApp IDs are on my cell phone. The only way to distinguish between them is that one has a photo of her and the other ID does not. One ID is for her new phone and one is for her old phone. WhatsApp can send text or call either phone, but she only carries one phone with her, and that phone is the phone that only works in Costa Rica, except WhatsApp can work with it. The phone she doesn't carry only works in the U.S. and WhatsApp works with that phone, too.

Nuria was out shopping and I tried to contact her by WhatsApp, but I used the wrong Nuria Identity on WhatsApp, so the WhatsApp text went to her new phone, which she doesn't use. I thought that might have happened and went to her new phone and looked at it to see if there was a message from me, but I couldn't access the phone because I don't have her access number. 

When Nuria got home I explained what had happened and Nuria was a little disturbed that I had texted her new phone instead of her old phone. But I ask you, don't you think this is just a little bit complicated? Don't you think it's an easy mistake to make? Yes, it's way too complicated. Maybe I should just delete the Nuria Identity that I never call. But if I do that, then for sure the day will come when I need to call it, and I won't have it.

Fudge!

The Latest

VirtualWayne is having a birthday in 4 days. I may be an oddball, but birthdays have never meant much to me. I know they're significant to other people, and I know that some kind of gift is considered de rigueur, so I try to give something when my significant others have a birthday, but I feel awkward when I receive gifts. First, I feel unworthy. Second, a gift of clothing probably won't fit me. Third... well, why go on? It would only depress me.

Then, 4 days after my birthday, I'll be up early to drive my friend Nuria to the airport. She's flying back to Costa Rica for two weeks. I have to leave the house at 4AM in order to arrive on time at the airport. She has to be there two hours before her plane leaves. Actually, one hour would be plenty of time, because the airport is nearly empty that time of morning. 

The local weather has been sunny this afternoon. It has also been rainy. Yes, it has been sunny and rainy at the same time. It rarely happens, but the sun was out and rain was falling fairly hard. I didn't time it, but it lasted a good while—an hour or two. Rain can be weird. One day when I was at work in a building that was about 60 to 80 feet from front to back, I was in the back of the building and I noticed it was cloudy and raining. I walked to the front of the building and saw that it was sunny and there was no rain. Maybe I shouldn't say rain can be weird. It's Nature that can be weird. 

By the way, Nuria heard from USCIS (U.S. Customs and Immigration). She has been approved for a Green Card. She applied about 17 months ago and has been waiting for a Yes or No. We assume the card is on the way, though whether it goes to Costa Rica or to my address is something we aren't sure of yet. Updates will follow.

Choices

If someone you know well, such as a daughter or a sister, isn't thriving; meaning, they aren't happy and so they aren't treating themselves well, and they're not eating properly, they're losing weight, they cry a lot, etc., would that make you sad? And what should you do?

If there is a God/Creator, I don't think He/She/It would intend us to be happy or unhappy based on the choices of people around us. Treat yourself well and try to help those persons you know who are unhappy, but do no let their unhappiness bring you unhappiness. Unhappiness is often the result of choices. You've heard people say, "I choose to be happy," or "She chooses to be unhappy." The person they're talking about may not understand it, but those around him/her can see how their poor choices are making them unhappy.

Perhaps you are the person who is unhappy. Even though you've made poor choices in the past, you can choose to be happy today. You can choose to do something nice for yourself. You can choose a different path for your life. Living your life the same way you have lived it until now obviously won't bring you happiness.

Choose to be in a good mood. Choose to offer a reasonable amount of advice and help to a friend or family member. But then choose to be happy. Your unhappy friend or family member may be going through a learning process. Help them if they ask for it. Be careful about taking on part of their burden. That can be an act of love, or it can be a trap. Remember that helping someone can prevent that person from growing. And who's to say that your help is the right thing to do? Maybe it hurts or prolongs the suffering of that other person. 

Sometimes, I think the best help is a good therapist. Note that I said "good." There are plenty of bad therapists out there, and they charge the same amount and sometimes much more. But a good therapist can help a person see how they might be hurting themselves and how to get "unstuck" from the situation they're in. A good therapist can help a person see that the night is not as dark, their life is not as gloomy, as it seems at the moment.

A Trip Home

In twelve more days my partner Nuria will fly back to Costa Rica. She will visit family and do some business and then, after two weeks, she will fly back here.

Having Nuria in the house has really spoiled me. I already know that I won't eat for two weeks. I won't wash laundry for two weeks. I can't say for sure, but I probably won't get out of bed for two weeks, except to drink water and pee. The funny thing is that while I'm not eating, not dressing, and not getting out of bed, Nuria thinks I will be able to water her flower bed in the front yard. But use common sense. How can I water flowers in the front yard while I'm in bed and naked? There is just no way.

Nuria, being a widow of a U.S. citizen (his name was Ralph), is entitled by U.S. law to permanent residency in the U.S. And she has had permanent residency before; she lived in the U.S. for ten years before returning to Costa Rica because of her mother's ill health. She and Ralph decided to stay in Costa Rica after her mother's death, so he obtained permanent residency there and Nuria gave up her U.S. residency. Then I met Ralph on the Internet and we became good friends and we video chatted every day. Ralph passed away from throat cancer, and I watched it happen. Nuria took care of him: bathing him, feeding him when he could eat, giving him injections of morphine for pain. She took care of him at home until the moment of his death. 

After a short while, Nuria and I began video chatting on Skype. After a few months, Nuria flew up to visit me. That was November 24, 2020. We've been together since then, except every five months she must return to Costa Rica for two weeks. Without permanent residency, she can't stay in the U.S. for more than six months. 

As I said, she is entitled to permanent residency because she had been married to a U.S. citizen until his death. She filled out all the paperwork, and there was a big stack of it, and she sent it to USCIS (United States Customs and Immigration) on February 23, 2021. The process was supposed to take 6 to 8 months. She has inquired about her application several times and the answer from USCIS is always that it's being processed. They also claim that her case is within normal processing time which, as I already said, is supposed to be 6 to 8 months, and yet she applied over 17 months ago. But you can't speed up bureaucracy.

Every time she flies here it's a gamble, because immigration officers can turn her away and send her back home. They don't need a reason. They can do it because they think she's made too many trips here. They can do it because they're having a bad day and want to share their misery with someone else. Every time she flies back to Costa Rica, I feel like we're rolling the dice.

So as I said at the beginning, I have twelve more days with Nuria, then she'll be gone -😞- and then she'll be back, hopefully, after two weeks ... assuming the Immigration People aren't in a bad mood that day. Please keep your fingers crossed for us.

Political Views

Like everyone, I have political views. They've been formed by a life of experiences, meeting and knowing various people, and a lot of reading. So my views are not likely to change when someone sends me an email. But I have friends who are right-wing; in fact, I would say they are fascist-leaning. I'm always getting emails from these friends and they suggest that I read this or listen to that. They want to convert me from my liberal ways to the "true" American ways we saw on display in Washington, DC, on January 6, 2021. 

Now it happens that I think all the flag-wavers that attacked our Capitol on January 6 need to spend some time in jail, and I don't mean a few days or weeks. I mean real time in jail, like you would get if you accidentally killed someone by reckless driving. Remember, they killed people, too. A mob is a mob. You can't point to individuals and say this person is less guilty and this person is more guilty. They're all guilty, because it was their mob behavior that enabled laws to be broken and people to die.

But what do I do with these friends I've known for many years who now want to "educate" me? They ask me questions like, "Have you read 1984?" — (Well, yes, when I was a teenager, and also "Brave New World.") They send me recorded essays to listen to, essays I've heard decades ago. Funny, no one has yet asked me if I've read novels by Ayn Rand or listened to lectures by Napolean Hill (I've done both. Rand was entertaining, though she was selling her own philosophy).

I've heard it said that there are two topics one should always avoid in conversation. Those two topics are politics and religion. Some people haven't gotten the memo. I suppose if I ignore enough of their emails, they might take a hint. Or they might not.

Coldplay

The song of the day is Viva la Vida from the 2008 album Viva la Vida or Death and All His Friends by British rock band Coldplay.

NDEs

I've studied Near Death Experiences for much of my life. I thought I should post a few minutes about them. This video is presented by Bruce Greyson, Professor Emeritus of Psychiatry and Neurobehavioral Sciences at the UVA School of Medicine. To watch the video full-screen, click the full-screen icon in the bottom right corner of the video.

Trumpmania

I was watching a TV news interview with a Trump supporter. This guy was elderly, looked like he might have lived his life as a farmer. He let it be known that Trump was his man. He was a dyed-in-the-wool Trump supporter. Not only that, but he insisted that Trump won the 2020 election. Of course, there are many who insist Trump won the election, but this man was different in that he insisted Trump was actually running the country now, and that Joe Biden is not in charge of running anything. 

So the TV news interviewer said, "The price of gasoline is going up, the price of food, the price of everything is going up. Inflation is high. Who do you blame for that."

Without hesitation, the Trump supporter said, "Biden."

Yes, the same Biden who, in his mind, lost the election, is not in the White House, and is not running any functions of government. That's the guy he thinks is responsible for the country's problems.

There is no way to argue or reach agreement with a person who is illogical. It's like the Jonestown, Guyana, mass suicide. For the 918 Americans who died there, Jim Jones was their reality. From my perspective, a large part of the Republican Party have turned their thinking over to the whack-a-doodles running on the fringes of the Party. It's a shame. I don't know if I'll be around long enough to see how it all ends up. I suspect it will be interesting.